Ok. It's that time again. WTF? It's only five in the morning? Damn. I need to get on a better sleep schedule. The problem with collaborating and being in love with someone on the other side of the USA is that sometimes you fall into their sleep patterns. Well, I think. I've never done it before. But it happened. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but sometimes you are gonna catch me writing this early in the morning and wonder why I do so much speed. I don't. I sleep from like 8 o'clock til 5. So you are gonna get some weird posts and I am gonna miss a lot of good TV and in doing so feel like I am getting pretty old. So when I woke up this morning, Michele was online. She decided we should do something, some post, short and fast. What were you listening to last.

See, now this one was just unfair. I get weird at night and listen to weird things. So first thing in the morning? I have no clue where I went last night musicwise. All I remember was Chef Ramsey and some beat bass in the background. See, when she goes to bed, I kinda stop hanging around here and just go into numb mode and type on Word about the next story we are going to do. So yes, a new "Underground" will be out today. Or tomorrow. Tales of Norway and pirates, but those take awhile for us to kick out. For now we wanted to do something fast.

So what are you listening to now?

Here's ours. And no one make fun of us.

Kool G.Rap and D.J. Polo - The Streets of New York

I don't know. Yes, I listen to other stuff besides punk. I have a huge CD collection and sometimes I get tired of hearing punk constantly. Truth be told, usually on Monday nights the music is constantly being paused so I can turn around and watch Chef Ramsey yell at people in Hell's Kitchen. That's a funny show. I always wonder who will be the first to tell him to stick his British fist in his British ass. Wait. I think thats a Motorhead song. Or maybe that was Iron Fist. Maybe I need more protein in my diet. Hell, I don't know.

Kool G Rap. Sure he slurred his words and had a lisp but his lyrics and DJ Polo made up for it. Plus it grew on you. This was a pretty brutal song about life on the streets. It wasn't like N.W.A. where they were bad ass gangsters and ruled the streets. This was just one man's thoughts about how shitty everything got. No one was a hero here. Parents ignoring their kids, cops sold out to the mafia, drug dealers killing their brothers, old ladies forgotten about dying in the subway, alcoholics drinking their life away, and young girls forced into prostitution. Kinda gritty stuff. I always respected this guy cause he always let it be known that he was in the shit, but he never bragged about it. Just told the world what he saw. What he thought was wrong. Then raised up his hands and said "Fuck it, what can I do. It's too much for me to handle."

So yes, I do listen to other stuff like this. But, unlike Michele, I don't listen to Air Supply. Although I do have a pretty kick ass collection of Neil Diamond songs. - T

Richard Cheese - Me So Horny

What do we have here. Ah, Me So Horny. No, not 2 Live Crew. Too early in the morning for that. Instead, we have the soothing, mellow tones of Richard Cheese and Lounge Against the Machine. For the uninitiated, Dick and his band do cover versions of hard rock, metal, rap and punk songs (plus some other stuff), lounge singer style. It’s part hilarity, part irony and mostly really cool. I mean, just imagine it. Sitting in a small motel bar. Downing a gin and tonic while killing time in some godforsaken town you are passing through. Tonight’s entertainment is some singer you never heard of but who reminds you of that Bill Murray character on "Saturday Night Live." Suit and tie, drink in hand, kissing the microphone while making small town talk with you. Piano kicks in and you figure you are in for some poorly constructed Neil Diamond singalong. You wonder if you remember the words to "Cherry Cherry." And then the dude starts singing: “Sittin at home with my dick on hard/So I got the black book for a freak to call.” What did he just say? Is that....2 Live Crew? Is he singing Me So Horny? “Im a freak in heat, a dog without warning My appetite is sex, cause me so horny.” Wow. Yea. He is. So you kinda groove along to it, thinking how romantic and endearing this tune sounds when interpreted by Mr. Cheese and his band. Oh yea, this is groovin’. This kicks ass. You find yourself nodding your head and singing along and you don’t even realize what you’re saying when you get to “Put your lips on my dick, and suck my asshole too.” You just sing. Because Richard Cheese can make even the most vulgar songs sound sweet.

[And notice that turtle makes fun of my Air Supply collection, but have I ever made fun of the fact that he listens to Madonna? No, I haven't.

Oops, did I say that out loud? Madonna? Turtle? Did I? I guess I did.]

And here's some extra Richard Cheese goodness for you:

War Ensemble (Slayer)
Holiday in Cambodia (Dead Kennedys)
American Idiot (Green Day)

So what are you listening too? Right now.

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