If Faster Than The World was Cosmopolitan Magazine....
by Meg

If Faster Than The World was Cosmopolitan magazine, instead of a nerdy treatise on "Stop Ninjalooting!" this column would be "What makes a party member keep coming back for more?" - a hip solo's guide to finding and keeping the ideal party.

Even independent gamers need to find a group sometimes. Maybe you're running the Deadmines, or you're getting up there in levels and you're hoping to find a nice guild and settle down. Follow our simple guidelines, and you'll be the most sought-after party member in Azeroth!

Lern 2 play nOob!!!11!!First, consider checking your CAPS LOCK key before offering or responding to an invite. Some people may find chat-channel shouting offensive. The CAPS LOCK key, if you're wondering is located just below TAB, or in WarCraftian, the auto-target button. It's easy to hit it accidentally while in the process of aggroing a huge mob. Remember, really hip gamers don't shout their Chuck Norris jokes either!

Once you find a compatible party in terms of level and player classes, how you interact with other PCs will determine whether you end up on a Friends list... or an Ignore.

What if you get yourself killed? Blindly charging in is one of a gamers unalienable rights, even if the founding fathers forgot about it. However, if it becomes a habit, and more importantly, if your suicide habit starts to affect other party members, you may want to consider apologizing and possibly listening to the group's tactics.

The downtime between battles is a great time for social interaction, but be careful what you say to a new group. Yes, you have a level 60 on every server but this one. And they all have purple-level armor and a quadrillion gold. You might even have a girlfriend who lives in Canada, too, but your party members may not be interested in this imformation. dance_elf.gifSave it for the comparison sessions on guildchat!

Don't assume that all players are male. Actual females, with breasts and everything, play WoW too. As do actual homosexuals, so a considerate gamer might choose to avoid calling other players "fags". Remember, other WarCraft characters may not be fourteen-year-old boys!

Don't ask other party members to undress and emote dance for you. Even if they're playing a female character. Even if you're pretty sure that there's an actual female behind that female avatar. Even if you know for a fact that there's a real female behind that sexy warrior!

Don't ninja-loot. Roll for chests! Don't Need items you won't or can't use! Don't loot while still in combat! Many otherwise compatible groups have been destroyed by a would-be ninja. Don't let this happen to you!

By paying attention to these basic guidelines for hip solos, you'll be bombarded by Van Cleef invites whenever you're in Sentinel Hill!

Meg needs to stop mixing Cosmo and WoW. Speaking of mixing cosmos...



While I spent the majority of my time in WOW running solo, I joined quite a few PUG's to better my gear. I always had more fun running in smaller groups (in smaller instances) than in running any of the larger ones. There's more a feeling of camaraderie, in my opinion, in the smaller groups.

You're dead on about the politeness and the non-ninja looting... I can't tell you how many times I just left a group because some fourteen year old knucklehead couldn't be bothered to roll on a damn chest.


I hate ninja looters with the passion of a white hot sun. I sit there and kill friggin moonkins for 20 minutes to get to a chest and what do I see every got-damned time? A fucking night elf or somebody running in and opening my chest just as I'm finishing off the last moonkin.

Then they just run off. No words, not even a brief glance in my direction to acknowledge my presence. I always target them and try to kill them with a fireball or something, but it always tells me that they're a friendly target. Bullshit.

There was one guy I remember, in particular. It was just after launch and this guy ninja-looted my shit all the damn time. It was like the dummy was stalking my ass and waiting for me to go into caves just so he could ninjaloot my shit. Anyway, I see him weeks later in Hillsbrad. I cursed him and continued on my way. Then I saw "help pls" in the chat bar, turn around and see him getting wailed on by a horde rogue that was about 4 levels above him but 10 below me.

I ran up and started dancing as the rogue sliced and diced the little bastard to death. As he died, I stood atop his remains and twirled around as I laughed. The rogue applauded me.


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