Fashion Statements
by Rockstar Mommy

My husband and I have vastly different fashion styles, always have. It pretty much boils down to this: I care about the way I look, he doesn't. His version is something more along the lines of this: She's an obsessed lunatic who spends way too much on handbags while I'm happy in my jeans and T Shirt because I'm a rational human being. His version, as you can see, is utterly ridiculous.

I've always found his fashion negligence a little endearing, actually. Except for when we have to be seen out in public together; then I cringe a little. He views mine as, well, obnoxious lunacy. as stated. But his opinion doesn't really matter since he'll happily wear a T-Shirt he got for free from the local Seafood restaurant (Something about 'getting crabs never tasted so good' or something. I don't know for sure, though, since I've permanently blocked it from my memory.). But so far, we've made it work. So, imagine my dismay when he walked in the door with a cowboy hat in hand. Yes, a cowboy hat. And not only did he walk in the house with it, but he stood in front of the mirror and placed it on his head.

snapshot3.png Me: You're actually going to wear the cowboy hat?

Him: Yeah, why not? I like it.

Me: But we're not down south.

Him: So what?

So, I think you're missing the crucial fact here that YOU ARE NOT A COWBOY!

Him: How does that matter?

Hmmm, well, let's think this out. If we're not down south and you're not a cowboy, then wearing a cowboy hat out in public is, well, ummmm, stupid.

Him: No it's not.

Yes it is. It's a COSTUME!

Him: Not really. People wear these things everyday.

Me: You might as well be wearing a sombrero and riding a mule.

Him: What the hell are you talking about?!

Me: I'll tell you what, I'll go out with you in the cowboy hat. And, since we're playing Dress-Up, I'll put on a pirate hat and a peg leg.  Oh, and the eye patch. And I'll get parrot to put on my shoulder and I'll walk around with you saying "Aaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhh, cowboy!"

Him: Okay, fine. The hat goes back tomorrow. Just promise to never make that sound ever again.

Girls, did you write that one down? When all else fails, just act like a pirate. You'll thank me later.

Rock Star Mommy is an Uptown Girl ...



Turtle has a thing for hats. I know he has a cowboy hat, but I still haven't seen him wear it. But I bet if I said this to him:

Me: You might as well be wearing a sombrero and riding a mule...

He would go find a mule.


Zakk Wylde, Jersey boy extraordinaire, has been known to rock the cowboy hat. But he does seem to wish he was a Southern boy.


Cowboy hats are all-season fashion. I wear steel-toed boots, and yet, I'm not in construction.


I own many hats. My two favorite being my Irish Tweed Driving Cap and, this time of year, my Stormy Kromer. I have the red plaid version for the full Yooper effect.

Don't mess with a man's hat. Seriously, we'll resent that shit for YEARS!!!


Can't say I'm a hat guy, but I totally agree with your man's choice of comfort over style. Jeans, and a t-shirt should be acceptable attire for damn near anywhere...


Can the Pirate imitation also curb a wayward husband's urge to wear his favorite athlete's football jersey and refer to his team as "us"?

More research is needed. I'm buying a peg leg today.


Oh yes, jeans and T-shirts for anything. About the dressiest I get is a polo shirt with jeans. I don't own a tie.


I have a cowboy hat that I bought when I was in Montana but I never wear it since, like your husband, I am obviously not a cowboy and I am in Massachusetts.

I sometimes see people who do wear them around here but I think they look like idiots. There is no such thing as a Massachusetts cowboy, so just take that Stetson off and put your Sox or Pats cap on because you look like a tool.


i wore a cowboy hat for two years once.


Honey has never worn a cowboy hat (to my knowledge) but to my horror, he did wear a pair of cowboy boots (or shit kickers as I call them).

He's from Brooklyn.


//i wore a cowboy hat for two years once.//

Yeah but you are kali so you can get away with it


people don't understand one about cowboy hats.

you wear a cowboy hat when you are going into places where you don't feel safe.

see, this is what people miss.

no one fucks with you if you are wearing a cowboy hat.

/this theory might not work in cowboy bars


I wore a suede cowboy hat back in my Lynyrd Skynyrd/country rock phase. Some punk stole it off my head.


This place is rife with cowboy hats. I don't mind them, but if you're a desk jockey, it might not be the hat for you.


I can't believe you're putting down free T-shirts from restaurants. What's up with that?

The sombrero and mule comment was hilarious!


I bet the Pirate thing is HOT.

Even the Peg-leg.




I feel your pain!
T-shirt + jeans = EVERY.SINGLE.DAY!


Dressing up is cool. I love my tartan bondage trousers and New Rocks. But I have to speak in a Glaswegian accent though, and my so called friends don't talk to me as much.

Q) How do you know you're a pirate?
A) You just know Yarrrrrrrrr!

*LOL* sorry.


Talking like a pirate makes me cool in this house. If Richy ever wears a pirate's hat, I will leave him. I've put up with having the only Puerto Rican in the world who watches Nascar, and I've put up with the fact that all of his clothing is the opposite of metrosexual. But I won't put up with cowboy hats.


Being a native Texan, one of the things I miss about living there is men wearing cowboy hats in daily life. Wish I could be with you on this one but......

Does he need boots? I'd be glad to hook him up next time I'm home!


Men (well most men) in cowboy hats are SEXY. Of course I am from the south. What I really find sexy is my husband has a friend who is a fireman and he is tall skinny (but no Kate Moss coked out skinny) wears snug fitted jeans, cowboy boots, a snug fitted white t-shirt and a cowboy hat. DEAR LORD it makes me shiver just thinking about him!


Coming from a cowboy folk's perspective (since I used to ride horses and participate in Rodeos), there is nothing but derision pointed at those who wear a cowboy hat and have never sat on a horse.

Of course I'm sure he doesn't care what actual cowboy's think...but he'd get his assed kicked in a cowboy bar. ;)


see, that would backfire in this house. my husband would love it if i dressed up like a sexy pirate and then i'd just end up having to have sex with him while he wore the cowboy hat.


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