The Hard And The Easy...
by Deb Beckers

It’s going to be a short one this week. I’m in recovery, fekking Junior A hockey playoffs. So we’ll have some interesting stories from around the league and a quick rant about something that’s been bugging me for awhile.

Boy & Toy.jpgBoys and their toys...

Here’s a point for the argument that we pay players way too much damn money...

Marian Gaborik (Minnesota Wild) has WAY too much a) money; and b) free time. He owns one of two CXC Simulations. For those of you who are scratching your balls heads wondering what the hell that is I’ll enlighten you.

It’s a simulator that models itself from the high performance race cars used in the Formula One circuit. The vibrations are the same; the handling is the same... Only thing that is missing is the smell of rubber and jet fuel. Well, that and actual danger.

But never fear! Gaborik also has two high performance GO KARTS! Seriously, this buggers go from 0 to 60 in about 3 seconds and have top speed of over 100 MPH. Think about it, a GO KART going 100 MPH, hugging the ground with your ass, with only a fraction of the body and safety features that the larger Formula One models have....

Sounds frightening and tres cool. So here’s to boys with too much money in their pockets a need for speed and great insurance policies.

Bet y’all* thought I wouldn’t be able tie in this weeks theme eh?

Around the League...

Shanny Injured.jpgRangers leading scorer Brendan Shanahan is on the injured reserves list, he suffered a concussion after hitting the brick house wall (uh!) that is Flyers Right Winger, Mike Knuble.

Ottawa Senator’s Coach Bryan Murray became the 5th NHL Coach to reach 600 wins with the Sens win over the Oilers on the 20th. He joins greats like Scotty Bowman, Al Arbour, Dick Irvin and Pat Quinn.

Best Headline This Week? - Montreal Canadiens call up Duncan Milroy and insert him into lineup... Luckily for Milroy they went with Plan B eh?

Ranty McRanterton

The GMs had another series of meeting recently in Florida. You know why they have these meetings so near the end of the trade deadline? To talk trades in their “off hours” (more about that next week) and to come up with little ideas from their little minds to piss me right the fek off, surprisingly they didn’t do that this meeting. Here’s what they’re discussing:

1. 3 points for a win. Why? Doesn’t make any sense... They thought it was a brilliant idea before the strike that killed my hockey for a freaking year, but now apparently cooler heads are prevailing. They rejected it. It keeps the races for placement tight and interesting, it’s a good thing =)

Bryan Murray.jpg2. Ridding Hockey of that awful fighting. JUST KIDDING!!!! They are thinking about changing the instigator penalty so that toughies won’t be afraid of suspension (like they are, they’re petrified of it I hear...) and will be more likely to step up and defend the “skilled” players. Besides they can’t get rid of contact all together, it’d be just like a NWHL game *snore* - no offence to the Mississauga Aeros or the Quebec City Avalanche (and if you DON’T know why this name makes me laugh, why are you reading a hockey column? Seriously.).

3. Video Replay. Giving the refs a direct line to Toronto and video in the penalty boxes. Y’all should listen to me eh? I love it when I’m right =)

4. 1-minute penalties in OT. Interesting idea, and one that they are smart enough to try out in rookie tournaments and the AHL first. This may be the best idea they’ve come up with yet?!?

Something’s gotta give. I’m sure they’ll fek up the trades or something...

Same Bat time... Same Bat station...

So next week we will be focusing on TRADES and PLAYOFF races. I will also be bragging and bitching about my beloved OHL Jr. A team and their elimination from the playoffs.

* I’ve decided I can use y’all because I’m from Southern Ontario. So there.

Deb is not going to buy you a Mercedes Benz, her friends all drive Porsches, Ugos and GOLF KARTS!



I wish I had an F1 simulator...


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