I Love Being A Mom
by Bonnie MeyerRosa

I love being a mom. I love watching my kids grow and learn, discover new things and
figure things out. I love that they depend on me for everything as simple as a kiss on the boo
boo to making sure they aren't the stinky kid at school. I love the chaos of the bed time
routine and the joy I get when I sneak in their rooms to watch them sleep. Yesterday was
different though.

99-back.jpgYesterday, I wanted to drive right past the driveway, down the block, out of town and clear out of the state. I wanted to never come back, never look back, and never be a mom again. I wanted to drive until the car ran out of gas. I wanted to cry. I didn't want to give another bath, wipe another butt, make another peanut butter sandwich or hear another whiney voice call me mommy. It was just one of those days. I really don't have them too often but when I do it kind of freaks me out. I was wondering all day what I would be doing if I didn't have to get home to the kids. Would my husband and I still be married? Would I be gettin' my groove on with the hottie from work? Would I be out with the girls, trying to get my groove on with some other hottie? Am I still a hottie? Would I not worry so much about finances? I hate when I feel this way, but yet I think (and hope!) that it is normal to have these kind of days....as long as I don't act on them!

I decided to not drive past the driveway and went home. Went through the routine with the happy mommy face on. Tucked my kids into bed, finished up all the other chores, poured myself a nice glass of wine and relaxed. I'm happy, very, very happy. I also looked at the calendar and saw that I will be 30 in a few days. Maybe it's a nearly mid-life crisis that I warded off. I should be 30 dammit, I've been married for almost 8 years and I have two kids! I don't want to get my groove on with hotties....I want to get my groove on with my husband for a bit.

So I went off and did that and then I peeked in at my sleeping, quiet children and thanked God that I didn’t keep driving...this time.

Bonnie just luvs being a mom

Raising Hell Archives


When that happens to me I just watch a rerun of Star Trek and thank god I don't have kids.

Prolly not adding anything to the post here....

I'll move along..


I am a worrier and I do this thing whenever I start worrying about my family.

When I don't hear from my wife during the day because she "always" calls, or if I hear about some bad news on the TV, or if she's late getting home, etc., I begin to worry if something horrible has happened.

A quick, vivid imagination cuts in and I begin to picture the worst -- fire, car accident, robbery -- and then I begin to wonder how I will go on without them.

I don't know if any of that is weird, I do it all the time, but I do know this next part is.

Instead of thinking the "I will be so emotionally distraught" kind of thoughts, I think -- Naturally I will contact the insurance company and begin getting funeral/medical, etc. arrangements in order. I will have to organize and get rid of all their stuff and move into a smaller apartment.

Hell, by the time they get home I or I hear from them, I've gotten over them and am planning what I'm going to do with the life insurance money.

All in the span of 15 minutes.


Thank you, Cullen, for making me see that I am not the only one that worries like that. I do it with my kids, my family and turtle.

I think it drives turtle crazy, but driving people crazy is what I do best. Better than being crazy alone.


I think we all must worry like that-at least those of us who care. Shit, I do the whole worst-case scenario in my head all the fucking time and I HATE it, but yeah, usually it leads to how to spend the insurance money and then i'm cool.

I also like to think that it helps me to be prepared for anything, including alien invasion and zombie attacks on my family.


I think it drives turtle crazy

why yes...

yes it does...


My worst images are those of my children's funerals...I usually have those when I am driving, for some unknown reason! I find myself crying like an idiot and have to snap back to reality! My "insurance" collection "dreams" only happen when my husband is late coming home from golf or poker!


The first time my oldest kid drove off in a car by herself.


I never really was in control. I just deluded myself for a while, is all.


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