Lovemonkey is a 40-something woman with the maturity level of a 12 year old. Ok, maybe 14 (depending on whether you're comparing her to an adolescent boy or girl) Long long long ago she decided it would be fun to experience a whole lot of life (before she was inevitably forced to wear age-appropriate clothing.) That decision, combined with her indecision about whether she liked Miss, Ms, Mrs. or The Late Mrs. front of her name prompted her to try them all on for size. Currently she's leaning towards Miss, because it suggests youth and has that whole Southern Belle thing goin'on, but this decision could change at any moment, given her track record and all. And then of course there are the times she refers to herself as The Dreaded Ms. Lovemonkey. But that's another story for another time (it's also when it gets really really fun.) This column doesn't fit into any category, really. This column is very eclectic (damn. I swore I'd never use the word eclectic.) So instead of using that word which others have nauseatingly used to describe me way too often, I will describe this column by giving it a subtitle: The Solitary Journey of the Insane and Very Bored. What you can expect – Cubicle Oddities. Stories about me. Stories about my grown kids, friends, my ex's - both the stupid one and the dead one, people more sad and disturbed than me, things and people I hate (there are many of these) television, movies, style and things that make no sense whatsoever. I'll probably also throw in some personal quotes, conversations I heard in the hall, the elevator or weird noises coming from my neighbors' bedroom. And of course you will be to forced to endure the written equivalent of the stuff that clonks around in my head at night (leaving some damn nasty bruises.) What I will try to avoid are stories about or including my cats. I can't promise anything, because I am currently single, a lifestyle which mandates cats, candles, shoes, Stouffers Lean Cuisine and tastefully decorated apartments, but I will do my best to refrain from mentioning Woody Allen or You're Not Worthy in any of my stories unless they do something horrible, terrific, or cute. Oh. Yeah. And occasionally I'll come off as a real know-it-all because I'm probably older and wiser than all my readers, if not everyone in the entire universe. Website: I Guess This Is It, Then Archives I'm likely to die of something someday Fade to Beige The Purple Handcuffs Lovemonkey Proposes Mandatory Helmet Law for Donut Shop Counter Clerks Disorderly Conduct Deep Thoughts Caused by Sea Life Blinded by the Light Fly Me to the Moon in a Tuna Can Ho Hum, Ho Hum, Ho Hummy Hum Hum That's Funny. That's Funny Stuff, Man That Seat At The Table Is Empty For A Reason |