new list time! let's get offensive! by Michele Christopher
Hey, it's time! Time to start a new list! The 100 Best Punk songs list was so much fun to do that we're ready to start up another round of list making. We already mentioned this before, but now it's official. We're ready to start making the list of Most Offensive Punk Songs. Let's just get this out of the way, what offensive means. We don't mean offensive to us, or to you, because if you were easily offended, you wouldn't be listening to the stuff we write about. And we don't mean offensive to someone like Tipper Gore, because, well, everything offends her. You could write a song about bicycles and she would find a way to misconstrue it to be about violent sexual predators smoking drugs and commiting suicide while chanting curse words at Satan. Oh yea, gives you new insight into Queen's Bicycle Race, huh? So for the sake of argument (and for the sake of this list) let's say that offensive means this: If you played this song loud enough for your neighbors to hear, they would either a) report you to the "authorities"; b) hide their children from you; c) pay Rev. Falwell $100 to pray for your soul; d) wrap their house in duct tape and tin foil to protect themselves from you or e) all of the above. Or, in more simple terms, if you sang this song in front of your grandmother she would make you wash your mouth out with soap. And you probably find the song amusing, at the very least. We're talking way offensive here. You might be thinking Blink 182's Family Reunion,, but that's just a bunch of bad words strung together. We're thinking more along the lines of Meatmen's Crippled Children Suck. Or that Guttermouth song about your mom fucking a donkey. Offsensive. Unpolitically correct. Mean. Filthy. Dirty. Deranged. Shocking. Apalling. Disgusting. Offensive. Yea, I know some of you already gave your suggestions in another post, but let's start this up fresh. Turtle and I will be following the same method we did for the 100 songs, posting our own favorites along with a little blurb about them. I don't know how many we are going for yet. Not 100, though. That's just too much. Whim, guys. Keyword for this site is whim. And now, offensive. Mamma always warned you about people like us. You know what we want. Give it to us.* *no, neither of us want anal sex with midgets, thank you. well, i can only speak for myself. i'll let turtle make up his own mind on that one. -M Update: We've started an annotated list over here.
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» Screw VH-1. This is the Top Offensive Punk Songs of All Time from Faster Than the World
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Comments
Fuck You! Overkill
Posted by: Andrew Ian Dodge | June 19, 2006 3:54 PM
ok -- not like i was ready with these or anything...
kill the poor - dead kennedys -- i was at my older, cooler friends house when i first heard fresh fruit for rotting vegetables. the album rocked so hard and said all kinds of shit i thought was offensive and punk rock. i couldn't wait to get to school on monday and drop some bombs about this to the cute punk rock boy that i was (read:still am) madly in love with. as i sat behind him in english class staring at the black magik markered "descendents" on his glasses strap, the opportune moment arose. my english teacher asked us for theories on how we would solve world hunger, so i shouted out (without a thought) "kill the poor!" what did mr. private school punk rock have to say about that? "that's fucking retarded. it doesn't even make sense." ... i don't think he got the reference. fucking poseur.
sod - speak english or die -- " you come into this country you cant get real jobs. boats, and boats, and boats of you go home you fuckin slobs" i mean c'mon i almost find this offensive. which is exactly what's intended. speak english or die? not just go home, but DIE! ya that's pretty good. and it holds up throught the years, doesn't it? there could be some arguement over whether this is punk or not, but fuck it, i think it counts. (heh. i just said butfuck)
bullet - misfits -- ok so the world loved johnny kennedy. who the fuck knows why. he was a womanizing piece of shit, but he was CUTE, and this is america so that counts for about 80% of our opinion. at any rate he's some sort of national hero, so you're not supposed to make fun of his assassination, much less hit up his grieving widow for a BJ. "my cum be your life source and the only way to get it is to suck or fuck ... masturbate me then slurp it from your palm..." that's some heavy shit there, boy. and they think ann coulter's bad.
Posted by: kali | June 19, 2006 4:03 PM
Bodies - Sex Pistols
Maybe it's not even that offensive, but just the way Rotten sings it gives it a really scary quality. Especially when the "faaack this and faaaack that" part comes in.
Posted by: Tim | June 19, 2006 4:51 PM
"Steal Your Beer" by Sloppy Seconds. I'll see if i can find the words for you guys. Or i'll just mail the song. Hmm just about any Sloppy Seconds song is going to offend someone, that's just my favorite.
Posted by: pril | June 19, 2006 5:03 PM
well, here's a list of a bunch of their lyrics.
http://www.lyricsandsongs.com/lyrics/SLOPPY_SECONDS.html have fun there. those guys kill me.
Posted by: pril | June 19, 2006 5:06 PM
> AIDS - SOD, heck even more offensive than Speak English or Die though not as topical as SPEoD right now.
"That's what you get for having a penis up your ass."
Too damn funny.
> I second Bullet and offer that Last Caress is also pretty damn offensive.
>I'm In Love With a Dead Dog - GWAR: Picking one GWAR song is impossible but I think this one is particularly offensive.
I lived in Idaho for a while -- my dad was stationed there -- and I would listen to this album while I mowed the grass. Sometimes I would sing along without realizing it. I actually had a neighbor come over and ask me to stop. It was during this song.
>The Salaminizer - GWAR: Well, I couldn't pick just one. Any song with the lyric: "I only suck the souls that are underage" deserves to be on this list.
Posted by: Cullen | June 19, 2006 5:19 PM
"Cunt Tease," Pussy Galore, especially when Spencer smirks that the girls he's been abusing are "always coming back, 'cause they're so fuckin' dumb." The chorus is pretty great, too.... Spencer declares that he's "nothing but a cunt tease," to which Christina Martinez replies, "Fuck you."
If you have this, I'd love to hear it again. My band used to cover this and the Ian Mackaye boys in the throng used to wail and gnash their teeth. Fuckin' punk rock Alan Aldas, all of 'em.
Posted by: Sakebomb | June 19, 2006 6:31 PM
fist fuck - dr know
the whole suck trilogy by the meatmen
1 down 3 to go by the meatmen "fuck fuck fuck the beatles" great line.
Posted by: the turtle | June 19, 2006 6:40 PM
I agree with Tim about "Bodies." I was all hot and bothered to nominate it. But since he beat me to the punch, I'll is already taken, I nominate two by Bikini Kill: "Suck My Left One" and "I Like Fucking." "Suck..." is more offensive, but "I Like Fucking" has the more offensive title.
AC
Posted by: Andrew | June 19, 2006 7:07 PM
I've Been so Mad Lately- Butt Trumpet.
Posted by: carol | June 19, 2006 7:35 PM
Argh Fuck Kill - Dayglo Abortions
The lyrics ain't much:
http://www.plyrics.com/d/daygloabortions.html
but I still remember the disgusted looks we got listening to this tape with my friends in my parent's car.
Include the entire album it's on - Feed Us A Fetus
Posted by: Scott | June 19, 2006 9:12 PM
It begins and ends with the Feederz "Jesus" (entering from the rear) - enough said. Also worth noting is the Nihilistics "Love & Kisses".
Good god, this should be fun!
Posted by: Eric | June 19, 2006 10:41 PM
Creatures is pretty offensive too man.
Posted by: M178 | June 20, 2006 3:32 AM
"4F Club" by the Mentors.
Posted by: pril | June 20, 2006 12:52 PM
"Jesus" by the Feederz is definitely high up there if not the top.
Possible entries:
Child Molesters - 13 Is My Lucky Number
Benedict Arnold and the Traitors - Kill the Hostages (offensive at least when it was released)
Helen Keller - Mein Death Kampf Shuffle
Curse - Shoeshine Boy (tacky song about a child murder)
Tad - Nipple Belt (maybe not punk rock, but any song about an Ed Gein trophy should get listed)
Weasels - Beat Her With a Rake
Posted by: Scott | June 20, 2006 12:57 PM
My boss walked into my booth while I was listening to Terrorgruppe's cover of Sex Beat. He was offended.
Pretty much anything by Butt Trumpet will do. And then there's Suicidal Tendencies' great lyrics: "I saw your moma and your moma was dead."
But speaking of German punk groups, I played an old East German band for my class once. They're called Schleim Keim. You didn't even have to understand the lyrics to be offended. They were that cool.
Posted by: tom | June 20, 2006 6:49 PM
ISM - Man-Boy Love Sickie
?? - Teenage Enema Nurse
Posted by: Scott Kirwin | June 21, 2006 9:05 AM
Wow, teenage eneman nurses. In bondage! I have to try to find a copy of that.
ISM ruled. THhy did a kick ass cover of I Think I Love You, complete with harmonica solo.
Posted by: michele | June 21, 2006 9:08 AM
Killer Pussy. That's who did the nurses song.
Posted by: michele | June 21, 2006 9:21 AM
Hmm... Pick just about any song by G.G. Allin.
Posted by: LS | June 21, 2006 9:58 AM
"Beat Her With A Rake" - The Weasels
"Beat her with a rake and make her pay for her mistake!"
And so on. Makes me feel dirty just thinking about.
Posted by: Johno | June 21, 2006 12:33 PM
How's about:
"John Wayne Was A Nazi" by Millions Of Dead Cops (Maybe the band name is more offensive than the song itself, but it's still quite a catchy tune.)
"How's Gary?" by The Judy's. (Sample lyric: "Mrs. Gilmore, Gilmore, Gilmore . . . How's Gary?/Now he never comes out to play anymore/And he ain't got nothin' to say anymore/All he does is stand over by the wall/And every now and then, he takes a fall . . . What's wrong with him?")
Posted by: Drew W | June 21, 2006 12:55 PM
Cullen that comment you made about singing along with GWAR made me laugh out loud.
Posted by: mrbandw | June 21, 2006 3:14 PM
Yeah, Stormtroopers of Death were brutal. F*** the Middle East, Pre-Menstrual Princess Blues, Speak English or Die, and The Ballad of Jimi Hendrix.
Don't forget Anthrax' "Startin' Up a Posse."
Posted by: Max | June 21, 2006 3:24 PM
Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction, mrbandw. It sure wasn't funny at the time though.
Posted by: Cullen | June 21, 2006 8:57 PM
definatly jesus entering from the rear by the feederz is the top. gotta love it!
Posted by: Andry Christ | December 15, 2006 11:28 PM
i think the most hardcore nasty song ever is the dropkick murphy's - irish drinking song, because they say their neighbor is a pretty whore! hahahahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
i thought it was hilarious
Posted by: kevin | January 21, 2007 10:22 AM