broken knees and burned dogs
by Turtle Jones

It's 2:30 in the morning. I've been up all night. If any of you don't know, I have a dog. A German Shepherd. She has been kinda agitated all night. Explosions bothering her. She sleeps on my bed and has a habit of biting my foot when she has a bad dream so my foot is pretty raw right now. Michele always wants me to call her when things like this happen, but I never do. I don't want to wake her up. I won't even log onto IM just cause I know she needs to sleep. But, tonight was bad. Lil' Brudder was shot. Michele needs to rest and I'm wide awake.

A little background about my dog. I was walking home from a show one night and I saw a puppy fucked up and broke up in the dirt. Strugging to survive. I kept walking but she kept looking at me. A little German Shepherd who just kept up with me. She needed to keep going. I grabbed her up and walked with her in my arms.

I have a lot of friends who do different things. Different jobs. Lucky for me I had a vet friend. A call was made and the dog was checked out. Dehydration. An IV was shoved in and the dog was under fast. But, she kept moving towards me even when she was going down. She just wanted to hang out. She could do it on her own. Keep in mind that I didn't know if she was male or female at the time. But, I knew she was beaten up and down and liked me I guess.

Fuck. I think I just got a dog. I placed a few phone calls and made some flyers for her.Trying to find if she had an owner. No one called. No one responded. Fuck. I have a new dog. This wasn't supposed to happen. But, she kept coming after me. This wasn't supposed to happen. Crap. I have a dog. It took her a few weeks to get back up to speed and become a dog that was full on dog. But, she did it all on her own. Sure, she has some scars and a few bruises, but she is the greatest dog in the world. She needed help at that time. Someone to pick her up. I was there to dust her off. But, in the end, she could do it on her own.

So, this day reminds me of what happened with her puppies last year. The puppies aren't around anymore.They have been given away to really cool owners and they are living on beaches and in the woods, which is more then I can say about her. One thing I love about this dog is the ability for her to pick out good or mean people. This is a huge dog with a weird name. I named her Lil' Brudder after a Homestarrunner cartoon. A one legged dog with it's face on the ground saying "I can make it on my own." That is my dog. She just keeps going. One day I might tell you the story of how I ended up in jail last July 4th because of what happened to her puppies but maybe not. All you have to know now is that you don't shoot Roman Candles at puppies and not expect a response from me. Don't burn my dogs, dude. You will get hurt bad.

But jail is jail and I'm really too tired to go into that and I've been told by my better half to never tell this story, but when you go out of your way to get your dogs out of the city and they still get hurt, it kinda fucks with you. But, as I said, the puppies are gone now but I still get paranoid at this time of year and my foot is raw. That dog bites hard.

Oh hell. I'll tell this story. I want you guys to know, first off that I can take a lot of pain. Alot. I don't care about shit unless one of mine gets hurt. Break a glass on my face? Meh. I don't care. But hurt the crew and I'll put you in the hospital. Innocent people, or in this case dogs, don't need to be hurt like that by drunk rednecks.

I had five dogs then. Lil' Brudder and her four puppies. The Cheat. Benny the 16th. Fark. And UFIA. Those were their names. Don't ask me. I had a voting contest on another website where everyone voted. That's just the way I am. I threw it out and the vote happened.

Anyways, I grabbed all the dogs on July 3 and headed to the hills. I wanted to get out of the town. I didn't need a puppy freaking out on me. I sure as hell didn't want five freaking on me. I packed them in the car and left. Grabbed one of my friends and hit the mountains. Sleeping bags, fast food, lighter fluid, a mini grill and some steak. And tons of Alpo.

We packed away, far away from civilization. Just a BBQ and the dogs. No big deal. Everyone here looked cool. No explosions. No one fucking around with fire. We could get thru this. I was just watching the stars when I heard explosions. What the hell? I turn around and see someone firing off a Roman Candle into the sky. Well that's great. I came up here to get away from this. Asshole. Dogs were running around freaking out. They were too young to really get it. God. The guy has another. Jesus. I see something hit near me. A ball of fire. An explosion. Right underneath the bench. Dogs freaking out. Another one hits. What the fuck? I crawl out of my sleeping bag. Another one hits.

He is firing them at my dogs?????????

Another one. Me yelling at him to stop. Another one fires. Benny the 16 lights up in flames. Direct hit. My friend takes some bites when he grabs her. Puts her on the ground. Stops the burning. Looking up at me yelling that this needs to stop. Do something about it!

I look at him holding the dog down. Felt another ball of fire pass my chest. Turn to the guy who is firing and just start walking towards him.

Ok hero. You just did something really bad. I walk up to him as he is laughing. A good 100 feet away. He knew I was going to hurt him so he shot fireballs straight at me. One on the chest. Push it away. Another on the chest. Push it away. One in the face. Push it away. I'm burned but I still keep walking towards him.

He hurt my dog.

My chest was burned and I probably didn't have much hair left on my head. I grabbed his shoulder and turned him to the side. He shot another one in my face as I pushed my foot with all my body weight into his knee. "Oh! You broke my knee! You broke my knee! You broke my leg! Call the cops! Someone call the cops! Call the cops!"

They show up later and arrest me. Being taken away, yelling phone numbers to my friend to get the dog some help.

Being asked at some little station about what happened by the police. Why did I do that to him?

The other cops came in and said how bad the puppy was burned. And it was a German Shepherd.

Cuffs came off. They pushed me out the door and gave me a ride back.

Little lesson for you all.

Never hurt a police dog.

They don't like it when they see one of their own go down.


Thats insane bro - what a dick! You never heard anything else about breaking his leg?


Amazing. I would have done the same thing. 'Cept, I probably would have been armed, so I might have wound up in prison.


Never saw the guy again but I knew he was still in the ER when I got kicked from jail.

Dude, don't hurt the type of dogs that save cops lives. It's no good.


How's the dog? y'all are in our prayers. keep us posted.


benny the 16th was killed about 6 months later by a car. This is the reason the other dogs were moved away. Fark is living with a nice family in the woods and UFIA and The Cheat are living in a beach house with a nice family.

lil' brudder is still here, but she can handle this area. The others needed to go someone else. I had resources to get them out. So I did.


Wow all I can say is that is pretty effed up that somebody would do that kind of thing to you on purpose and unprovoked like that. Totally senseless. Sorry to hear about the car accident, but it's good to hear the other dogs are all doing good. Hope you got some shut-eye.


before we get any farther into this I do want to say this was last year.


i can't tell what i would've done, but probably not enough damage.

i had three dogs freaking out for the past two nights. actually it was kind of nice, they all stayed in bed with me!


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