What is all this crap about strong women? Being a self-proclaimed “strong woman” I thought I would write about my experience as a woman whose personality often times awards her with the title of BITCH. Let me know if this sounds familiar. There is a nifty little comment box at the bottom, holler if you feel me.

You go to a function that is “voluntary” (In the military nothing is voluntary) and “everyone” is there. Some random wife that you’ve seen only once gives you a hug and says hi in a way that makes dogs come running. Not only are you now embarrassed for her but you are looking around to make sure you don’t get bit in the ass by some
random dog. And your husband and his friends are making fun of you because the “girls” just screamed to say hello. First of all let me say that woman should never do the hello scream. The hello scream is for teenage girls under the age of 14. 14 is even pushing it.

Laughing loudly is okay to a certain degree but usually it's only okay as long as you have a beer in your hand. Besides wanting to smack your husband for making fun of you, you feel violated. Who is this random woman hugging you? Did she wash her hands after she used the bathroom? Did she take a shower that day? Unbelievable, because if you don’t hug her and smile, you are the bitch.

Here are some other good ones. You know what you want and you are a bitch for it. Some examples:

You tell your husband (in front of another couple) to get you a drink. You don’t ask because if it were the other way around and he told you to get him a drink you’d get it for him. But because of this, you're being controlling. Now I’m not being rude about it. I could be saying, “Get me a drink fool” but I’m not. I say, “Honey, get me a Coke”. DING DONG BITCH. Who has time to sugar it up? I’m thirsty!

You and your husband get invited to go to a party but you don’t like the dude that’s throwing it so you don’t feel like going. You tell your husband to go and have a good time. Your husband doesn’t want to go without you so he stays home. He could have gone to the party but he chose to stay home. DING DONG BITCH and now your husband’s balls are in your purse. First of all, I don’t like any balls in my purse so can you get them out, please and secondly this is the guys fault but somehow the “strong woman” always gets blamed.

The thing is, it actually hurts my feelings to be called a bitch and I’m sure there are other woman out there who would say the same. Not the real bitchy women though because they’d tell you that they don’t care what other people think. I know better but I don’t say anything because sometimes being a bitch is the only way to get the job done and sometimes its just fun. Oops there I go again.

Andrea isn't really a bitch. She's just drawn that way.

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