cars of the night: movie version by Michele Christopher
Tonight we each pick a car from the tv/movie list here to write about. We’ll be doing this about once a week, so feel free to keep adding suggestions to that list.
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Yea, calm down, dude. Have some Funyons and a beer. Watch the fucking movie and shut up about your father. His car is pussy compared to this thing. Well, we never really get why this car was murdering random people in this town. Maybe it just doesn’t like the desert? Maybe it was offended at the way the Indian dude was portrayed? Maybe it hated band geeks or James Brolin's facial hair? Who knows. We got evil, suspense, an explosion, some cool mow-downs, and enough false scares to make some paranoid stoners nearly wet their pants. Hey, I said nearly. All that was missing was Yeardley Smith yelling out We made you! How legend is this car? It made an appearance on an episode of Futurama. So thinking about this film all these years later, I’m wondering what it would be like if all the evil cars in movies got together for one big showcase showdown. Christine. The Camaro from The Wraith. The black ‘Cuda in Phantasm III. The Charger from Wheels of Terror. Put them in an open field and let them go at it. I gotta think that the Lincoln would be the one left standing. Because Satan drives a Continental. - M The Interceptor. The Road Warrior. Ok. Let's just start this off right. This car meant something more than driving. This car meant way more than anything about traveling. This was a car that got through the end and still managed to pick itself up and walk away. Sure it was beat the fuck up, but it got out. It walked away. You didn't. So this was a god damn car that could take everything you could toss at it and wouldn't stop till it dropped. That's it. 1973 XB GT Ford Falcon Coupe. Modified with blower and NO2 running thru the system. Back window kicked out to fit in extra gas tanks. Cause you never knew when the gas was gonna run out. Cause if it did, hey dude, you are in Austraila. You stopped being "kinda fucked" and graduated to full on "I'm fucked " right when that damn engine stopped. So you will do what it says. It's not about you anymore. It's about the car. Don't get this movie wrong. A car wasn't about moving. A car represented life. Something that meant everything. A symbol that if this thing couldn't keep running, your life couldn't keep running. If this thing keeps running, I can breathe another day. I can live as long as the interceptor started. That was the Interceptor Yeah, I get deep sometimes. Don't ask me about Twinkies or I'll tell you the meaning of life. But this car was fully loaded. Faster than anyone one else. Don't stick a god damn arrow in this motherfucker and expect it to go down. Fuck. It's been through a fucking war. Your "woo woo" sticks just piss it off. Just like a mosquito bite. "You are annyoing." "Please stop shooting at me." "I'm getting kinda pissed here." That was the Interceptor. Slicker than anyone. Dirty as fuck. You have a feeling that car has had to pick itself up off a bar room floor many times before and it would have to do it again. But it had to keep moving. The gas ain't gonna find its god damn self and if it just layed down, it would die.That car was the Interceptor. Black as night, tough as shit and loaded with dynamite and gasoline and NO2 and a sawed of shotgun and a knife under the tailpipe and a cool doggy seat for his doggy! This car was coolness in the prime. Uncut coolness. If this car was cocaine you would be on the ground not being able to breathe while your friends sat around, watching you choke on the dope you just did and thinking "COOL!" Then running to do their lines. Cause that was a cool car. "Hey dude, it must be good. It almost killed the turtle. Bust out a line a for me."
What the fuck else could you want from a car? Plus it had a doggy seat! And that's fucking cool. -T Misfits - Horror Business TrackBackListed below are links to weblogs that reference cars of the night: movie version:
» cars of the day: scooby snacks and a mission from god from Faster Than the World
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Comments
Don't forget that Max's Interceptor got run down by a Ford truck and taken out by an exhaust pipe.
Posted by: Pat Patterson | June 6, 2006 12:05 AM
Don't forget that Max's Interceptor got run down by a Ford truck and taken out by an exhaust pipe.
the exhaust pipe was part of what made it cool. Loaded with dynamite knowing that if it went, it was gonna go out in style. It didn't wanna go but it had seen it's time.
Posted by: the turtle | June 6, 2006 1:38 AM
Wez used the exhaust pipe while the Interceptor's gas tanks blew up.
Posted by: Pat Patterson | June 6, 2006 2:46 AM
I was on some type of psychadelic hallucinogen featuring Mickey as "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" when "The Car" was shown on network TV back in '80 or '81 and I laughed my ass off.
Also...
Having his wife and kid murdered did piss Max off, but he didn't really become "Mad" until they killed his dog.
Posted by: Rob@L&R | June 6, 2006 7:06 AM
"The blower, man!"
Posted by: Zarba | June 6, 2006 8:19 AM
Plus it had space in the back for cases and cases of doggie dino!
Posted by: mrbandw | June 6, 2006 10:34 AM